WHAT DO CYBERBULLIES LOOK LIKE?

ENCYCLOPEDIA DRAMATICA'S ANNUAL "LULZCAST PEDOPHILE CYBERBULLY CONVENTION" PHOTO GALLERY:

If one had to guess, one would probably describe the average cyberbully as a fat, ugly, toad-like creature bent over a dirty keyboard in the corner of a dark basement. That assumption, although an accurate characterization of their inner psychological makeup, couldn't be further from the truth.

One Anonymous cyberbully was kind enough to send me a link to these "highly professional" photos which were shot by a "great photographer." Let's have a look:

1. These two look normal. The only thing unusual about this pair is their age. Most people conceptualize cyberbullies as angsty teenagers, not middle aged swingers:

LULZCAST + ED PARTY

2. Okay this is more like it. Total pedophile. Ever wonder what kind of person buys a blowup doll, but not as a joke?:

LULZCAST + ED PARTY

3. Okay I get it. If you're a mediocre "photographer" (there's no such thing anymore), you can become "professional" simply by canting the camera at ridiculous angles. Anyway, these two guys arrived in the windowless child-snatching van:

4. Pedophiles. The down syndromed douche on the left is fisting the fat one, who is staring at a dog's ass.

5. This ape is coyly displaying the dead bird on it's hat, hoping that females will recognize him for his great hunting skills and reward him with sex:

6. This creepy fellow spent hours in front of a mirror messing his hair up "just right":

7. "Beep beep, Richie! Want a beer? They all float down here....don't you want to go down and float with alllllll the other little boys and girls?" :

There you have it. ALL the people who attended the "LULZCAST CYBERBULLY PEDOPHILE CONVENTION." It doesn't look like very many people because it wasn't. Most people who use EncyclopediaDramatica.com have electronic bracelets which prevent them from venturing more than 10 feet away from their front doors.



TOM NEWTON